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Sexuality : What Do Gay and Bisexual Men Want in Bed?

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Hey, guys! What do you want in bed? Also, what is your favorite sexual act? Is it kissing? Giving or receiving oral sex? What about anal sex; do you not feel satisfaction unless you penetrate or get penetrated?

Further, is there something you want to do more in bed but for some reason or another you are unable to? And why are you not able to do so? Would you like to receive more or perform oral to your partner more? What about kissing, maybe your fuck buddy doesn’t like kissing because apparently there are people like that: their idea of kissing is a peck on the lips, absolutely no French kissing for them, please.

We are asking because there is a study that said only 36% of their respondents “reported receiving anal sex” and only 34% revealed “giving it.” Kissing and oral sex though are really quite popular at 75%. On the other hand, “16% of the men confirmed they “held their partner romantically, kissed their partner on the mouth, and they also engaged in solo masturbation and/or they masturbated their partner, got masturbated by their partner, plus there was also genital–genital contact.”

Said study was published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine and was conducted by researchers from Indiana University and George Mason University. The sample of the study is quite significant as they surveyed almost 25,000 gay and bisexual men.

Anyway, I think whatever the survey says we can all agree about one thing: we all want to feel pleasure. It’s the “how” that varies which brings us back to the question: what do you want in bed, guys? Is there a particular sex activity you wish you’d do more with your fuck buddy or boyfriend or husband? Share with us your thoughts and stories in the comments section below.


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  1. Darryl

    There are so many fun things to do sexually in today’s world. The problem is finding someone who equally shares the same feelings you do. Sometimes the connection doesn’t seem to work nearly as you planned, so the satisfaction level is pretty low. But when you meet someone that turns on your switches, it makes everything you dreamt about makes it all worth it. Let’s stop turning sex into a errand to run, and get back to connecting with the person, and find out what we really want and need.

      • Lamar

        WTF? Everyone makes of it what they will, man, just because you’ve reduced it to something as shallow as “sport.” Don’t get it twisted, sex, mere, sex, is the game, as love is the quest of life, “love and be loved.” Something much more deeper!

  2. MusicBear88

    I think that there are as many answers to the question as there are people who are asked. It’s also different for me depending on who I’m with. With a passionate guy, I want more body contact and kissing, with somebody who’s more of an animal (for lack of a better term), I would rather more genital contact and oral sex. I only have anal sex with my partner.

  3. MattK

    I’m bi-married-closeted. My desires for homosex arise about once every 2-3 weeks. I don’t get any sex at home as my wife and I haven’t made love in about 2 years, but even when we were more active, I’d turn to guys just the same: They give me what I could never get from her. So perhaps unlike my hetero life, I’m into kissing, oral and fucking. I’d even be into more if I weren’t scared as shit about catching HIV or other infections. When you break it down, it kind of make sense: Kissing guys is drastically different from kissing my wife. It’s far more sexual, I love the feeling of our rough faces rubbing – it’s just entirely different from the delicate loving warm kiss with my wife. Sucking – she could never blow me as well as the worst BJ I ever got from a guy. And sucking dick – well, she ain’t got one! Fucking: Tighter up a guy’s ass and it’s just a whole different scenario. My homo side is a delightful enhancement to my otherwise daily hetero life.

    • brian64

      i totally agree in the same boat has you and i have to your pretty spot on love a dick in my mouth love 69 will get both getting sucked and sucking i also love to get fucked and can not get that with the ladies

  4. Commandobttm

    I’m greedy. I want to kiss, make out, touch, stroke, suck, nibble, sniff, lick, caress, suck, get rimmed and bred. If he falls asleep afterwards, that’s even better. If he gets up leaves, well, that why they call it hooking up.

  5. john

    I like a big cock that can slide into me and make love to me for more then 20 seconds before cumming and kiss me like he likes it.

    • Dallas

      Because only the top 1% of gay men look like that, and the ones that do, only associate with other gay men that look like that as well.

  6. Francis Asissy

    Well, it matters where they did the survey. Philadelphia is full of bottoms, probably 60% of the men in adam4adam, and only 20% are tops. The percentage of bottoms is even higher when you include straight men. At least that’s what they say they want.

  7. Matt

    I want and like the whole deal. My idea session is after we both brush our teeth and gargle with mouthwash; we take turns using the bathtub taking full head to tub soaking baths. We both douche our asses until no sign or trace of fecal is present.. I love that fresh after bath smell on my partner. Then we get naked under the blankets and deep french kiss slow and passionate tasting fresh minty breath. Then we do nipple play making sure equal attention is given. Then we slowly emerge in the 69 position tasting each others dick and nuts. Pubic hairs and genital areas fresh and clean smelling like body wash. Then we gravitate to taking turns eating each other asses equally of course. I bury my face between his ass cheeks and taste nothing but freshness and good squeaky clean ass. Then we take turns fucking each other in our favorite comfortable position. We take our time and fuck slow and easy kissing every chance we get. We stop to cuddle and kiss and just hold each other and then go back to fucking like crazy. We make sure we both are comfortable and enjoying the moment. Then we both decide verbally when we want to nutt and how and where. And then we both climax ending a dynamic electrical satisfying session. We lay there awhile to compose ourselves, a sweet kiss on the lips and we both clean up quickly at the bowl in the bathroom and then go to sleep apart in the bed to rest.

  8. Chris Warburton

    I Love being romantic in bed, I take love making very seriously so all I want in bed is someone that’s willing to go the extra mile to please me as one have pleased them in some shape or form

  9. Andrew

    I’m a top bi 26 year old guy, I love romancing and kissing getting intuned with my lover, wouldn’t kiss if the guy/girl has bad oral hygiene etc, but I prefer getting a blow job over penetrating anyone, and I would reciprocate oral back if I am in the mood, I live it when a willing tongue flies into my ass hole and tosses my salad for a good 1/2 hour or hour, drives me wild.

  10. Foootliver

    Giving oral sex is my main preference. The longer I can suck a dick the happier I get. I want the guy I am sucking to lay back enjoy my mouth as much as I am enjoying sucking him. I want him to feel comfortable knowing that I will swallow multiple loads from. Also, love to worship feet. Some guys get into it letting lick their feet to my hearts content.

    • Andrew

      @footliver would love u to do that to me bro I take a good while to cum like hour, hour and a half, and I always wanted my ass licked and size 13.5 feet licked when it’s clean.

  11. Joe

    I love to be topped by my partner and have him cum in my add I love kissing him and feeling his hairy body against mine also love to rim his hot hairy hole

  12. Lamar

    It all varies, doesn’t it? I will say across the board, just simply, easy access period. But, that would be the average of all these types of fore-mentioned sexual beings. Me as a gay man: I want/ need a man who is also a best-bud and sexually open-minded, also-additionally (like me) has a high-libido. He loves deep-kissing and foreplay of all types, including foot-fetish play, and lots of oral, I do not any longer believe in anal-sex unless we are a committed-monogamous couple. He loves to cuddle, he finds that sex/good love-making is like a multi-coursed meal, to be enjoyed, not rushed through.

  13. Jeremy

    I love receiving anal sex! Though giving a bj or 69ing also works for me. My favorite 1 on 1 experience is sucking his nice 7.5 inch cock, sucking his big balls, 69 for 4 or 5 minutes (letting his cock get all the way down my throat), then having him put my legs over his shoulders as he pounds my ass, ending it with huge spasms of cum on my face.

  14. Tc (brigs54)

    I am married, closeted. I have progressed from being a pure top in my 20s and 30s to becoming an enthusiastic bottom. I have to get fucked, i love feeling a guy come in me. I get tested often. I’ve found that I’m a size queen, the bigger the better and i love giving myself to any man, knowing that he is safe with me and vice versa, and the harder the better. I don’t even care about coming, i just love the lasting vibrations that come from a long session of fucking with a good man. I will come if he wants, and do, but i just like the way getting fucked transforms me. It is the most singular act i know.

  15. steamy4u99

    There is really something thrilling about being naked with that guy you find so sexually attractive. For me, it’s all about the foreplay leading both of us to that mind numbing conclusion. I love naked body contract with mutual touching, caressing, sucking as a build up to both oral and anal sex. I love it when we work ourselves into a frenzy getting to that point, and as a conclusion I personally enjoying the feel of a nice hard cock plunging deep inside me.

    • roguelike

      Nothing is so hot as getting naked that first time with a guy you really want to fuck or fuck you. The foreplay, slowly shedding your clothes, making your way to the bed, and then, while you are kissing each other, your hard penises jabbing at your respective chests, you roll over and one takes over and you feel yourself breathing out while he stretches your hole with his hard penis, filling you until his heavy sac is up against your upturned ass.

  16. andy19806

    I’m a bimm and have tended to meet other bimm which often creates a problem. Many will not kiss or snuggle while being aggressive at giving and receiving oral and, sometimes, receiving anal. It seems like kissing another man is more “gay” than sucking his cock and the bimm (and some single guys) don’t want to admit to themselves that they are gay. For me, the kissing and other foreplay is critical to a positive experience which of course should lead to the other stuff. I have engaged in anal as a top but has never been my favorite. For me passionate kissing with mutual oral is the play. Mutual ball licking and cock playing with breaks for passionate kissing and body contact are the peak experiences.

  17. Jay

    I love it spontaneous. I had a bf from Alabama that took lots of baths. I’m a more typical shower guy so one day I get in from work and he’s in the tub. I just got in with clothes on and started making out with him right there. He was so turned on and we just ended up going at it like rabbits. I was bracing myself as best as possible and he loaded my ass so deeply and passionately. I’m also very fond of getting mornings started with the first rise of morning wood. What can I say. I like toys in great working order.

  18. Hunter0500

    I have a handful of valued buds that I get to play together with singly (and more now and then) from month to month. The experience with each of them differs. They are who they are. I value how I’m motivated to do different things with them each that I would not do with them all. Yes, a lot of it is the same. But each guy has his own style, his own bag of tricks, his own mix of what he offers me in bed. And with each I respond differently. And happily.

    And I guess that’s just it. It’s not about what I want, what I expect, what I’m going to say i HAVE TO HAVE every time I’m with any of them that makes time with them awesome. It’s not always about “what I want”. It’s’what we bring to the table and make each other want do to when we’re together. That grows and changes over time. Expecting a guaranteed package of goods is going to leave you disappointed, sad … and quite alone … ultimately.

  19. Dan

    I am an oral top. I enjoy long passionate sex. I like to start with kissing and touching each others bodies…then one of us moving to start pleasing the other orally. I like mutual oral…and long oral pleasure. When it comes to fucking, I like to start slow and increase my rhythm as my lover wants. After we both are satisfied, I love to lay next to my lover holding each other…talking…being silent…or falling asleep in each others arms. I have been lucky to find many men that like the same as me.


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