Fantasy : Straight to gay is it OK?



It seems that there is more and more porn focused on straight guys ‘gone gay’. It all makes me wonder why. Have we as gay men grown tired of each other? Is it internalized homophobia, that we don’t want another gay man in our bed? Are straight guys are more ‘manly’ than gay guys? Or is it something more sinister, is it that we secretly want to turn a straight guy out? Or do we just want to get what we think we cannot have?

Maybe it is all of these and more, but it is ok to try to get a ‘straight’ to have sex with you?

There has been a lot of talk over the years about the exploitation of women as sex object, but we rarely ever hear of the exploitation of men as sex object, is it because we are ok with being perceived as a sex object? What about the straight guys? They may whistle at women as they pass by, but what happens if we whistle at them?

So come on guys, I’m confused, what is it about the straight/gay thing that is so hot (or is it) and is it ok?


There are 158 comments

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  1. allmouth4u

    To go where no man has gone b 4. Ive had a few str8 friends that would always cum 2 me when they were inbetween girlfriends or that time of the month. I loved it & so did they. LOL

  2. Rich

    No there are more married men that have found that sex with another man is more satisfing then with a woman, I am one of those, I have been married for 31 years and the sex with another man with no long term commitment is what I want, I love my wife but sex with her is dull. I have a bf on the side and hanging out with him in public is accepted more then if I was with another woman.

  3. Dale Nimmo

    In my neck of the woods, it’s because all the gay men are FAT and all the women are FAT as well. Come tothink of it, all the married men are FAT too…I seem to have a theme going here

  4. Dave

    I know many straight guys and I was one who fantasized about gay sex. Now I have many friends who are gay and I prefer spending time with them. Gay guys are more fun to hang with. I have a close friend who shares times with me and sometimes sex. I love him and the times we are together.

  5. scott

    str8 guys are MORE manly than gay men. they dont have the drama either. not the hangups, gay men have. i have a nice list of bi men i have sex with. all are married or have a gf. we enjoy each other. no complications. i am 55 yrs old and just average in looks. guess i am lucky.

  6. 2pack

    I feel its just one of the things that you know is taboo and that adds to it being more desirable. Anytime I was told not to smoke or drink I had the urge to try them..
    for some its also the fact that if a str8 guy has sex with you… you are appreciated and desired by both str8s and gays… and who wouldn’t like that…

  7. Lorenzo

    I was straight and married with children, I traveled a lot in business. I would go to bars for a relaxing cocktail after working all day. I was sitting on a bar stool when this hot blonde dude came up and sat next to me. We talked and laughed for an hour and he kept getting friendlier. I felt his hand move towards my crotch, I didn’t know what to do so I let him. He started rubbing my crotch and my cut cock started getting hard, I was kinda embarassed but it felt good. I had not seen my wife in two weeks. He bought me a drink and a shot of tequila and we steped out onto the patio, we were the only guy out there. Once again he began rubbing my crotch making my cock rock hard. He pulled down my zipper, pulled my stone hard throbbing cock out and began to suck it OH FUCK WHAT WAS I DOING, WHY DID I LET HIM…it felt so good sliding in and out of his handsome cock hungry mouth and down his deep throat. I was totally confused but I loved it, now when I go back to Austin Texas, he cums to my hotel room and we play all night long, I got to eat his squeky clean bubble butt ass which made him stone hard, then he fucked my hot tight virgin latino ass nice and slow making sure not to hurt me, now after a few months of experience, I love to ride his cock as I look deeply into his blue eyes and I love to eat his squeky clean bubble butt ass, don’t know how long this will last but I’m loving it.

  8. Clay D


    I really think you nailed it on the head, so to speak, with this:

    “Is it internalized homophobia, that we don’t want another gay man in our bed?”

    The fact is that we’ve all been encultured in an overwhelmingly heterosexual society, and all have internalized homophobia to some degree. Can we make the commitment and the effort to really turn the beast of homophobia around…right where it needs to?

    Cause if we can do that, our chances of creating a beautiful relationship with another GAY man are fair-excellent!

  9. Shane

    I personally find it to be an odd thing. The truth is that what makes us gay is our sexual behavior. So, if a man has sex with you then he isn’t straight by definition anyway. It’s why we always put the word straight in parenthesis when we talk about it. That means those who seek that are saying hey are attracted to men who can’t live in truth with themselves. I think that is sad. I suppose if you want to accept the role of a sexual predator then you might see it as “harder game to hunt”, but that in itself is sad too. I for one am comfortable being gay and only want to sleep with guys that are equally as comfortable with themselves.

  10. David

    first of all this picture turns me on. as far as the article goes: all men are welcome to do as they please. I don’t mind gay or straight men in porn just NOT INTO THE WOMEN

  11. Dj

    Don’t know I don’t deal with so called straight men, they want their cake and eat too. They their girlfriend or wife or one side and boy toy on the other, I say pick one.

  12. cheque_mate

    90% of those ‘straight’ men in porn are only pretending to be straight.
    Have an ex that was in one of the straight gone gay porns. Obviously since we were dating and fucking on a daily basis. he’s not straight.

    it’s more of the idea that a straight guy wants to get fucked that gets people turned on (atleast for me.) It’s along the lines of we want what we can’t have.

  13. CatchTheAir

    Bluntly said, I think its kinda twisted, in the bad way, to “turn a straight guy out”. We as a community cry and petition and rally and complain and stand against people and groups that try to convert or “fix” us into seeing the world with out homosexual tendencies. These people and groups put our community through hell, to change us. Why should we stoop to their level and try to do the same. Now if a “straight guy” has “gay sex” on his own, thats fine…hes just curious or bi. But why should we make that “choice” for lack of better words for them? We should be better than that…right?

  14. Jaymaul

    The straight guy thing is defiantly hot. There is something about seducing a straight guy that I like. Plus I’m generally turned off by an obvious gay guy, but the catch is if the guy actually wants to hook up he obviously wasn’t all that “straight” to begin with.

  15. CJ

    It’s totally about what we “can’t have”! The chance to be the first to change a “straight” guy, yum! It’s overly exciting!!

  16. tracy

    It because of the first reason because no typical wanna be gay Guy does not want a gay Guy because the think that straight. Can make them feel like they fit way more in the world if there’s a butch manly man on there arms the just as arrogant as women a Guy who is untouched with his feeling is weak and not a man and if you ask me it makes them stronger so there you go straight chasers.


    I guess it has to do with something that we can have.
    At work there is this guy, i know he has a girlfriend and i know he is straight, but at the beginning i was giving signals to him that i like him eve thou a knew i couldn’t have him. He was very friendly with me so he also gave me the impression that he might be into me. But after a while he stop talking to me and i stop trying, to the point we grow apart.

    So i guess is that we want something that we can’t have.

    BTW don’t whistle to a straight guy you might get in trouble and not the good kind of trouble lol.

  18. Bryan

    What does straight really mean?! I know that for myself I had known about my aesthetic and sexual attraction to men since adolescence but choose not to act on it until just before my 26th birthday where I already had one child. Now I have two children and consider myself bisexual though not actively pursuing women. Gay men are often confused about what to think of my choices and how to view me, nevertheless there should be a limit to any objectification of the body and/or individual. If you respect yourself and others, then there is no reason why it should not be ok, especially if you do not harass or force yourself upon anyone!

  19. Devon

    Yeah, I think it’s pretty funny that we want straight guys to turn gay, but then when someone turns straight we say they are brainwashed.

  20. Sir Norm

    Actually it’s all a matter of perspective. If I go to a gay bath house and see only men with men, one assumes their all gay even if that isn’t true. On internet adult sites one never knows who’s who per se. I find more bi married bottom guys at say the tubs than actual gay males like on this site. That’s because gay guys seem to be into countless emails and rarely if ever show up. I freely give out my phone number only to find no call and 3 messages online when I check again. Straight to gay. At least the “straight” bi guy will show up even if it is only at the tubs 🙂

  21. Mannois

    This is waaay too complex to tackle in this fashion, but I’ll take a stab. On the surface, I think part of the sexual turn on is that there’s some uncertainty as to the outcome — will he or won’t he? — so we have sexual tension that is (all too often) lacking in gay-on-gay scenarios. In other words, it has become too easy to have sex with another gay man — so, yeah, some boredom. Hence, also, the rise of barebacking. So, I’d also expect there’s an aspect of being turned on by the taboo. But, subconsciously, there’s more going on. As suggested in the blog, there’s probably some internalized homophobia — or an aspect of it — Namely, if we can turn them gay then maybe we aren’t so “abnormal.” Or, perhaps even: if they can “go gay” then maybe we can “go straight.” Again, an attempt to “normalize” homosexuality. Or, even worse: Misogyny — as in, “I can tempt a man just like a woman can and/or please a man better than a woman. A woman is no match for me. I am more powerful than a woman.” More to the point, the successful seduction of the straight man would also, by extension, suggest superiority over him as well. So, I’d attribute all of this to pride and Ego. It’s about dominance and the need to feel powerful. Which brings it all, neatly, back to the challenge. One can hardly feel that one has honestly dominated someone who was a sure thing all along.

  22. Older Dude

    I don’t seek out straight men, however, I offer erotic and sensual massages for free. 90% of the guys who contact me and become regulars are married. Are they straight? Not when they’re on my massage table. They want to suck cock and feel a cock or dildo up their ass 80% of the time. Always want oral. I’m older and overweight, so these 20 to 60 somethings aren’t looking for a relationship. Neither am I. Just sex. They love being touched and told how great they look etc. Wives don’t give them that anymore. Don’t want sex as often and don’t compliment him like they used too. Even though they work out at the gym regularly. I don’t think they’re straight. They just married and had families because that’s what society told them they had to do when they got out of school. They still are curious and now they are acting on it. They don’t want to change their family status. I love these guys because I don’t want a relationship either. Just to be friends and have sex. Works great for me and them. I probably see 20 a month. Many have been coming to my house for years. We go out to eat and go to sporting events etc. all as friends. Love it.

  23. Jake

    For me the pursuit of straight men is generally a fantasy but has happened before as well. I think we want them because we always want what we can’t have. That’ just human nature. But also for me personally it’s the subliminal allure of stealing a player from the other team so to speak. Just knowing you can is a very sexually powerful feeling. Had a str8 buddy who was really against gay sex until he broke up with his gf and hadn’t had sex in 3weeks. He was so horny I got him a tiny bit drunk and gobbled his cock and ass. Felt so good he asked me several more times to do it. Felt awesome knowing I got this ‘str8’ boy to change his perspective.

  24. Mike

    I really don’t understand what the obsession is about str8 guys. They can not offer me anything more than a one night stand which involves them being drunk and then having to keep it all secretive, it’s not worth it to me I don’t care how hot you are. I think a lot of the gay community has stereotypes and judgements against each other and think str8 guys are more masculine and hotter which is why I’m into the whole scene, and disagree bc you don’t have to be str8 to be masculine. And then in porn people are actually paying str8 dudes and tricking them into gay sex?!! I will never be that desperate. Smh

  25. Marty

    Interesting question. I’m a straight guy. Yep, it’s true. I like watching straight porn with a man and a woman, lesbian porn with two women, three ways with two women and a man, two men and a woman, and a little bit of gay porn with two men. It’s just fantasy and play for me (it’s just sex). I imagine it’s just a fantasy thing for gay men to watch straight guys crossover. It will be interesting to see how the replies to this question play out.

    More interesting to me is how so many gay men insist there is no such thing as bi or straight just playing around. It’s not like a gay man is suddenly straight if he has sex with a woman for fun.

  26. david

    almost 99% of the dudes I bunk with are str8 I am gay and they find me in personals. When I ask why fucking guys most of them say, want to see what it was about, experimenting . Today a marine came over, I detected he was a little stiff, so as I was up against him I said how experienced are you. He said, I have never been with a dude. I thought ok, then I noticed he was a marine from a tattoo he had. He wanted to see what it was like to fuck a guy, he also wanted to see what it felt like to be naked with a man, kiss a man on his lips, things so many of us take for granted, It was one of my better nights.

  27. Muofasa

    Nothing to the illusion, its “the Tiger or the (Wom -?) Man”. We love nothing more than the question. Only an older (Adult) person chooses to recognize that “change isn’t always best” because after a certain point, it becomes scarier than the alternative.

  28. Prsnofnote

    1) The conquest—it can be a “notch on your cock” (as it were) to have successfully bedded a straight man
    2) They’re really just like us—Lots of verbiage out there about how straight men are different from gay guys. Successfully seducing a “straight” guy can be proof in point that straight men aren’t so different from gay men, after all–didn’t someone say that the only difference between a gay man and a straight man is a six-pack of beer?
    3) I personally believe that only a few people (of either gender) are totally hetero or totally homo. I believe there’s a vast majority of people in the middle range who have the capacity to be aroused sexually and experience sexual gratification with their own gender given the right set of circumstances, time, setting, relationship between the parties, etc.

  29. Muofasa

    Oh, P.S. I love straight guys and have moved 2 of my sister’s, straight fuck partners, to cum at me. The 3rd one (and probable father of the baby) just hit me in the eye with a phone, circa 1980, during a fight between the 2 of them.

  30. Nick

    Because gay guys are pernicious whores. If a straight guy “goes gay,” chances are he hasn’t already been with the rest of the village.. It’s hotter to be with somebody who has not been with everybody.

  31. Rob

    Hot straight guys are a challenge. Most hot guys know they’re hot and love the attention. Some are open minded enough (read curious) that they play along. Some will go farther than others in the right circumstance. I believe in the Kinsey scale

  32. 44107

    For me it’s all about the chase. I love a good one and I never back down. Yes, I have had a few straight guys in my time and have enjoyed it so much. I do not think straight guys are more “manly” then us who are gay. From my experience I have had with striaght guys the sex was some of the best I have ever had….

  33. Darian

    Speaking from personal experiance. Its more of the forbidden fruit angle. Growing up with mostly straight friends and having crushes on 90 percent of them its always been a fantasy to connvert them… least for a night. When I look at porn I always look at it as a fantasy deal anyhow so it just works for me. 😀

  34. cntryman

    Ive never really given this any thought, but I am now wondering if maybe we just think a straight guy might be safer (health risk wise) since all the fear from HIV and AIDS has come about. Just a thought. I know plenty of gay guys who are much hotter than the straight men I know.

  35. Yungobruh

    It’s fantasy bullshit created by porn producers. They found a formula that sells so they push it on the public. I guess the idea behind it is supposed to be that a heterosexual guy can be so hot and horny he will fuck another man. Similarly the porn industry pushes lesbianism, (“is that a word?’…anyway,) on hetero men. Supposedly it’s hot to see two women hook up. African-american men are stereotyped too. Big dicked thug pounds white ass. Think about your sex life in reality and what turns you on? How much if any of it is what you see in porn? Real people don’t even fuck in those positions they show! But we’re horny. We watch porn. The fake images the producers put out there sells. Me personally I look for flicks which show two guys into eachother making love. Which are few and far between and getting harder to find.

  36. MarqueeTee

    This is a great topic and hope I can add my 2 cents coherently on this blog. Let me first start off by saying I am re-evaluating myself for personal reasons. I came out AGAIN to my son (whom I’ve had custody of since birth). I say again because all while growing up I talked to him about sexuality and my sexuality at different periods of his maturity. Last conversation was at his entering high school, 10 years ago. This Jan 1, 2012 I sat him down and we talked again. He doesn’t really remember detail but said the same as back then, “Dad, you’re my father and I love you” . And added, “I figured as much…”. I never paraded men around him while growing up, not even a very special friend. Of course I did my share of creeping around for hook-ups, etc, but I never brought that home so to speak. Guys that I had long affairs with (to me meaning slept with more than once), I made sure they appeared to be str (BINGO), as if we were just buddies hanging out on the town or a sporting event, etc, in other words, doing macho manly things. The point of this testimony I guess to be really honest with my son, people around me, and most importantly myself. I have made a lot of changes the last year as to who I am; very big step. and I am ready for a LTR, “INTIMATE”!!!!!!

    I am currently reading a book I’ve had for years and never even read the introduction. A self help book entitled “Intimacy Between Men; how to find and keep gay love relationships)”. I read a little and reflect on it, re-read passage/chapter, reflect again. So it’s gonna take me a while to get through this 242 page small book and so far I am seeing a lot of myself. Authors claim it’s a good thing if I can relate and identify…

    All that being said, let’s get to your question or observation. I don’t know! For the sake of argument, it is an on going unanswered question. I believe all men str or gay love to be admired by other men in every way (physical, achievements, acquisitions, power…). How that admiration is accepted is different between two men and two women. You know the comedic scenario where a woman can compliment another woman on a physical attribute or article of clothing, etc and even say how sexy or hot she looks. Males can not do that (str) without being uncomfortable or how it is directed, etc. MASCULINITY and what that is and how it’s understood, is the key word. That varies from culture to culture as well as society to society and eras. For three obvious views, just look at America, Europe, and third world countries. Three completely different views, opinions, and practices.

    Seems pop culture has a lot of influence on now WE think and do. Look at how the porn industry had changed. Yes I do enjoy watching. It’s safe sex for me if you know what I mean 😉 It has always struck me odd, the reality based porn. Str guys doing gay things. The categories (one I just mentioned), Str To Gay, Gay for Pay, I’m a Married Man, etc always entice us for that str acting or str man! What always kills me is, the models are looking at str porn (zines or video or dvd)….

    Is it the freshness (not gay fucked out) of a str man that appeals to us? IDK! Is it the challenge ( I can have you if I really want) of a str man that appeals to us? IDK! Is it the masculinity (so butch and rugged) of a str man that appeals to us? again, IDK! I think it is a combination of a lot of things.

    Me, I seem to be attracted to guys I can’t have (gay or str). Given the situation it left ample time for flirting, cruising, and fantasy. And you know what, I never got with any of those either. If the opp came knocking, I wouldn’t answer. I enjoy the chase, wouldn’t want to ruin that 🙂 I do find myself attracted to str men and str acting gay men. It’s just my preference ok! I like a “butch” kindda guy. But I really hate to use the phrase “str acting”, it’s so negative to us.

    I’ll end this for now, I hope the read your reply, and others. I hope I kindda stayed on point. But you see I like to talk 🙂 Stephen, you have raised a very good discussion topic. Hurray for you! ;-*


  37. Archer1955

    Well, hell, it’s just that there are so many really hot looking straight men! I personally do not necessarily want to be with a guy that I can readily discern as being gay. Just my preference, that’s all.

  38. m

    While I enjoy little sinister plots to get guys who seem straight, I’m almost always sure he is probably still in the closet.

    As for my sexual preference, I enjoy gay for pay sites and what not–but honestly it’s because I prefer masculine men. If I wanted to date somebody feminine, I’d pick up a chick. I think it’s more of a rebound from the more feminized aspects that ‘gay’ takes in the mainstream media.

    I remember watching Queer Eye when I was a teenager and thinking most gay guys I knew were like Ted, but it seemed the proper way to act was… well you get the idea. I think that’s true, the majority of gays in my area are just normal dudes…

  39. lasttime101

    you know its def been a fantasy of mine to have sex with a straight guy but when it come down to it he would just be gay then…so all that gay for pay crap is bull, there just as homo as me lol

  40. matt

    I think you are confused! I think the only reason is that we want to believe that there are more gay guys out there and its somehow satisfying when a straight guy enjoys gay sex.

  41. Keil

    The point you bring up about it being ‘okay’ for straight men to hit on women is an interesting one. The objectification of a man, through a homosexual male’s eyes- perhaps this needs more delving into. Though for now, it seems to just be a question of appropriateness.
    In certain settings, it is quite a bit more appropriate for a straight man to hit on a woman. In most settings it is usually welcomed for a gay man to hit on a woman. Same would go for any other situation, wouldn’t it? What is appropriate.

  42. Hyde

    It’s like how you were never allowed something growing up but saw it all around you all the time, just wanting to try it, I’ve had sex with a “straight” guy before, the first guy (other than his gym buds and doc to see his junk), we flip flop, It was great, it felt different but you know its more than likely a once and “never speak of this again, or else” situation. We see guys we find sexy with their gf’s and feel bad, but for that one moment you win inside. well that’s how I see it!

  43. cubforyou

    For some reason or another I have had more “Straight” guys in my bed recently than in all my 40 years of being out. Many of these have been guys who have recently lost their wives due to death or divorce or guys that I have just casually known for years….
    Most all do not want anyone to know anything about their secret desires and are very adamant about it.

  44. CTA

    With any sort of sexual fantasy or fetish, there is always going to be a crowd that will be associated with the “forbidden” or “impossible” moment, which more or less describes just about every “straight to gay” fantasy out there. I know many straight guys; while I tease them a lot, I’ve never met one who I thought I could convert if I simply tried hard enough. That doesn’t mean that I can’t get off on imagining what it would be like if they DID decide to “experiment” with another guy.

    As for making men into sex objects…it’s a difficult topic. The sex drive of the average male works entirely differently than the sex drive of the average female. While this isn’t universal, many men are actually *empowered* by being made into a sex object, as it validates them as being virile, and having appeal. Some men get off on that while others don’t, and women are often the same way – ask yourself, if you see a group of women going to a club/bar together, how often have they seemed to be competing? It happens, and we ALL do it, consciously or not.

    Back to the original topic though: fantasies are just that – imagined circumstances. Left at that, there is no harm in the fantasy, and thus nothing wrong with it either. Now, trying to force yourself on “a straight” becomes another issue entirely…so why not just leave the fantasy to yourself? Or maybe a good friend who likes to fetish roleplay! It may not be quite the same, but hey, a good roleplaying couple can have tons of fun in the sack. Go for it!

  45. Ryan

    When you’re talking about porn of course guys are being sexually exploited…the people watching are generally jacking off to them. When it comes to “straight to gay” porn, I think it’s popular because a lot of people can relate to it. The porn vids themselves are extreme for sure, but they’re not just banking on fantasty…many guys and gals experiment at some point with the other gender. There is a lot that could be debated about bareback porn, but straight to gay doesn’t seem that bad. In real life the straight guys I experimented with didn’t have a bad time. 😉

  46. Dan

    Enjoy your porn and stop letting Christian pseudo-feminists find a way to make you guilty about it. It’s a fantasy. It doesn’t have to be coherent, it doesn’t have to be realistic, and it certainly doesn’t have to preach a message. It’s not sinister, it’s a fantasy.
    If you want to analyze it to gain sometime of “deep understanding” from it, how you interpret it is going to depend on your hermeneutic and your viewpoint. Nobody can tell you what the “true meaning” is because there is no true meaning. Just like art and religious scripture, Everyone who looks at porn interprets it differently.

  47. vik

    as someone who prefers straight to gay porn, stories etc., i` have to say that all of these things come into play. For one thing, growing up in a small town and being the only gay guy i knew of, i, of course, ended up having crushes on straight guys. So i guess, for me, it`s a continuation of those fantasies as well. Also the idea of turning a straight guy out is a powerful thing. There`s the power and ownership value. Also, if you could be the one guy that they sleep with, or at least their first, then it can make you feel good about yourself as well.

  48. PYRO91

    Hey, I can explain my poibt of view. To me its a game. You see I personally like sex. But I dont come on to straight me becaus I dont know how they will react. So its a thrill when I get the chabce.

  49. alwaysb!!!

    There is a lot going on here. The most problematic is the association of heterosexuality with masculinity. Not only CAN gay men be masculine, most that I meet ARE very masculine. (This also has nothing to do with their preference for sexual positions.)
    Second, being attracted to the narrative of “straight” gone “gay” is all about the individual interpretation. When I see “straight gone gay” vids, I assume one of two possibilities. Either the guy is getting paid a lot of money or he has been curious for a while. Or both. Either way his actions outshine whatever label – gay, straight, bi, etc – he chooses.
    Finally in regard to exploitation, A4A, as a venue, is all about objectifying individuals without regard. Is it a problem for the gay community? Probably. Is it something the site should address? Perhaps. But should we feel sympathetic to “straight” men in videos performing homosexual acts? No – they’re being paid for their performance, and they have probably fantasized about these behaviors earlier. The problem is whether or not in the real world a gay man cat calling a straight man results in a punch in the face, or worse. Until we can be sure that scenario is a thing of the past, there are still bigger problems to deal with.

  50. James

    I am a gay man that has lived in a small town in Indiana all my life. There isn’t a whole lot of gay guys where I live. So when I go to a bar, its a straight bar. So I flirt with a lot of straight guys. Sometimes I get a guy who is curious about what it would be like to be with another guy. I don’t think it’s wrong, I think its promoting understanding to what it means to be with another guy. Everyone goes through a stage in life where they wonder what its like to be with a same sex partner, I just give straight men a chance to experiment with that fantasy, or curiosity.

  51. Nate

    Straight and even bi men only mean one thing to me, universally – They’re bad at head.

    I never understood the appeal of the “straight” man.

    However, I do believe that gay men have adopted a somewhat restrictive gender binary, where traditional “Masculinity” is esteemed, and femininity is disdained. I think we’ve absorbed a lot of the sexism of the hetero world.

  52. gw

    yes, to all you r questions. i think all are valid and true. there’s one factor with straight men that you didn’t mention and that’s the fact that we are partaking of that forbiden fruit that’s so hard to resist and so appealing.

  53. Jay Matthew

    Humm. How about this. How about we stop thinkingin terms of straight and gay for a moment. Let’s say that the wall has been broken down. We just have guys and gals. First. Why just guys and gals? Simple. That’s what the “world” wants us to think. Second. Why break down the wall? Simple. Because one does not exist. Not in our heads. Not in our bodys. For sure not in the real world. This is not a matter of gay guys being less attractives or sexually appealing. Clearly that is not the case. This is a matter of not being taught to be sexually atrracted to guys like that. We find the same advertising that is geared towards women is what appeals to us. Why? What else is there. Gay media – as a perfect and tragic example – is virtually powerless. Personally I don’t tune into gay spacific news outlets often. Honestly, I’m not realling tuning into many LGBT centric places. Because I am a person. Not a gay person. Not homophobic either, and I’m not ashamed to say that too many gays in one place tends to not be such an amazing time for me personally. Straight guys are easy, man. Being gay is hard. Its not sexy enough for prime time. What I’m saying is if you think about it its pretty obvious.

  54. Dustin

    Maybe it’s about approval. I feel like straight men look down on gay men for liking anal sex. If you can get a straight guy to like gay sex, than you can tell yourself that it’s ok to like it too

  55. J.r.

    I think it’s more of what we can’t have that’s so hot about it. I mean if there where two hot guys one gay and one str8 what one would you pick? Prob the str8 one even though the other one would be a sure thing I would pick the str8 guy and see if he would be up for messing around i bet hes thought about messing around with guys b/c he herd guys give better head (which they do) Maybe its a young guy thing Iam 22 maybe that’s it lol. Btw whos the hot guy in pics above?

  56. PumaDude

    I’m bi, married, and not out. Since I have a strong appreciation for both genders it’s hard for me to let go of the idea that every man has a little homosexuality in him. My intrigue with straight men is determining which of them would explore that part of them with me. I think that even the straightest of men have wondered about having a beautiful cock in their mouth. My gift to all men, gay or straight is the opportunity to taste mine.

  57. John

    Is rather simple…..there is a very large population of both homosexual and gay men who long for and are attracted to what men want. More and more men want MEN!!!! That is they want guys that are manly and act like a man. They are into guys who are not femme and or all gayed up and caught up in the gay world. The gay world has become over obsessed with itself and being gay, many have forgotten the very basis of it all. We are attracted to men!

  58. tyler

    for me, When it comes to ‘str8″ guys… it isnt because im tired of other gay men….
    ITS THE CHALLENGE. Getting a str8 guy who every one says “oh hes straight, you cant have him” is a challenge AND I ACCEPT!

  59. birball here

    I think that happened to me. I had a girlfriend, and one fine day I was giving someone a blowjob lol!” see how easy it is to turn??!” lol!”

  60. Bill

    I’m not into str8 men. If a guy says he’s str8, I respect his word. But if a “str8” guy comes on to me, he obviously isn’t totally str8.

  61. link1986

    Today’s society is driven by the “All Mighty Dollar” which in turn can make even the straightest of men do things such as gay acts, if the money is right. I am not saying that if you want a straight man to have sex with you you have to pay because that is illegal to some degree. Although if a straight man wants to have sex with a gay man they I do not see the issue. No matter who you are there is and will always be a wonder of “What is it like to have sex with another man?”, and the same can be said about women. So I would think that it is by luck that some of these men get that wonder fulfilled and make money while doing it.

    Objectification is and will forever be one of those things that is and isn’t. In some aspect everyone wants to be noticed in some way or other, though there is a chance that you can fall into a stereo type. Some do not care because they are getting the attention that they want. All-in-all people have their own reason for wanting what they want, it is the rest of society that views wonders and experiments as wrong and degrading. But that is all in the eye of the beholder. On a side note when you throw religion in to the mix that is asking for a lot of problems. I do not condemn religion but I believe that there is a place and time, and state and personal choices is not one of them.

  62. Nathan

    For some people, its more the challenge of getting something they cant have, i have this ex, real FINE fella, kinda irresistable, almost everything he did or said he did it in a flirting manner, even with fellas he just met, and most times the curious ones took the bait, so he used to get his freak on with a “supposedly” straight man from time to time, said he always liked the challenge. Me, its more the virility that attracts me.

  63. X factor

    It all comes down to preference. A lot of guys do prefer a more masculine type. Straight, or “straight” is usually synonymous with “macho”. Therefore straight often will be defined guy who exudes masculinity in a way that comes naturally. You don’t even have to like vaginas anymore to be straight. Just watch sports, say “bro”, “dude” and “man” to everyone including your own mother and be able to describe a car beyond its size and colour.

  64. Topaz

    From my experience ST8 men are not turned out , it’s who their willing to do it with . Better yet , offer them some Chronic and a can of loco , and get it poppin .

  65. Hunter0500

    For decades, in athletics men have banged each other in numersous ways. They’re gripped each other. They’ve thrust against each other. Afterwards, falling back breathless. Not much different than sex. With acceptance of gays growing over the past 20-30 years, straight guys have crossed the line to sex with buds. They must have asked, “why is it that only gay men get great sex with no strings attached?” For them, sex with women is good; sex with men much simpler, much more straght forward (pun), much easier.

  66. Earlybird

    I don’t think it is even possible. You can only get it up for someone that you are attracted to sexually, and straight men are not sexually attracted to other men (gay or straight). Gay men are attracted to men, but if the man is not gay, why waist your time?

  67. chuck

    It’s they are more masculine and not catty guys who say they are masculine but are pretentuous, picky, and judgemental. They are carefree and spontaneous, they like to go hunting, play basketball, softball and ride motorcycles, instead of going to the mall, online shopping or watching Rupaul’s drag racing. Ill take masculinity over everything. As long as they have a job or car. Blue collar is a plus. So u dont have to deal with the grimminess of nasty cut throat corporate attitudes.

  68. Completestars

    You are right, straight guys are more masculine/manlier than any gay guy. I have always fantasize sleeping with a straight guy, so I always watch straight men gone gay.

  69. Anoymous

    I don’t know about anyone else but for me it’s always been a fantasy to be some str8 guys first. First guys to suck him and first guys he sucks. It turns me on.

  70. seniorsub

    I was like a lot of men when I was growing up. Considered myself straight and figured some day I would be married with family which I did in my 30’s. I had a couple of sexual experiences with men when I was younger but wrote it off as a one time fling and that my “curiousity” would be satisfied. Well guess what. It wasn’t. In fact as I got older (40’s) my attraction to men was getting stronger. I was finding a lot more satisfaction from sucking cock and getting fucked than I had ever had with a woman. I am 60 now and to be realistic would consider myself gay. What I was told growing up was not normal I know now is BS. I have accepted who I am and don’t plan on looking back.

  71. stjoeguy

    I’m not offended by str8 going gay. if anything, men are finally willing to submit to the desires of their bodies, and curious about things. I think it’s a great thing when a str8 guy discovers that he really enjoys a gay (or other man) fucking him and feeling the urge to kiss and be kissed by the other man. It’s a matter of self confidence.

  72. tony

    even though gay guy models r hot i prefer str8 guys. More manly usually natural don’t shave or trim… I love guys with thick hairy pubes and armpits. I’m tired of all these clean cut trimmed gay guys

  73. tony

    U can’t have a str8 hot guy. U want what you can’t have. Just like str8 men wanting hot lesbians. Plus str8 men more masculine and don’t usually don’t shave or trim.

  74. 4x4lvr

    So. is this article about internal homophobia, or double standards, or exploitation?? This article is lacking the focus it needs to generate definite reader response. Compare it to the response on the article for age discrimination in the gay “community” and I think you can see the difference.

  75. YesItsReallyMe

    I think these questions are misleading and misunderstanding the situation. I, also, have noticed the upswing of “straight going gay” content online, but I would ascribe this to something more broad than a single example of internalized homophobia.

    Porn is a product so let’s figure out why it’s selling. In the stream of cultural and social progression, the overall image of male-to-male sexual contact is less vilified and the broader perception of what is manly doesn’t necessarily exclude being physically attracted to another man. Historically attitudes about same sex contact have varied according to the social mores of the day and our culture is no exception. There’s a large body of historical evidence that same-sex contact has always been going on. But obviously, guys getting with each other isn’t/wasn’t talked about or acknowledged. When a behavior is degraded, people shun and hide it. When it’s not, people don’t. As our culture degrades same-sex contact less these days, men are willing to explore that side of themselves. Just as they have in other centuries and cultures.

    On the fluid spectrum of sexuality, the bi-modal definitional differences of “straight” and “gay” are misnomers. The concept of undefined sexual orientation is confounding for some. Someone will say “So, what ARE you? Are you gay or straight? You need to pick one.” Not necessarily.

    So who’s the customer of this supposedly new market? Any man who is curious or turned on by seeing men. Enjoying two (or more) men have sex doesn’t make another man “gay” anymore than enjoying a man and a woman (or more) have sex makes me “straight.” (For the record, I’m a huge fan of bi porn. And bi men. If you’re bi and reading this, email me. Just putting that out there.)

    Sexual expression is hard-wired to the human experience– as is curiosity. It’s a beautiful gift of being human. It’s normal and healthy to be sexually curious. Mankind has explored every inch of our planet– even journeyed into space. How much more enjoyable and interesting to explore every inch of our fellow man?

    So what’s hot about it? Sex is hot. In a very broad sense a man who is open minded and confident is masculine and as society vilifies same sex contact less, the more we widen our definition of what is masculine. And that is incredibly hot.

  76. butteebunzz

    Definitely ok. What could be wrong with it? If a str8 guy sleeps with us it’s his doing. He’s an adult and is responsible for his actions. Been with a few “straight” guys (yeah right) and it’s just plain hot seeing him experience man on man sex for the first time. Can’t wait to do it again.

  77. Tony

    I believe with straight/married guys, its a greater chance of the guy being “masculine”, if that’s what you’re into. Many guys are NOT turned on by feminine guys and also, there are many gay guys that do not know the definition of what “being masculine” means. No pun intended, but muscular and masculinity are totally two different things. So, to answer your question, yes, straight guys are way more ‘manly’ than gay guys. I hope this helps…

  78. dee

    See for me honestly I don’t believe that a true straight man will give a gay man the time of day. For the so called “straight men” I believe that they are already curious or on the DL they may be a little more complicated to get too because you have to be their type and very discrete but there gays at heart

  79. USMEX83

    Some gay guys or straight by general do look more develop than others. By that I mean they have very stronger facial features and thicker and fuller body composition. However, sadly enough some of us don’t either because of genetics, lack of proper nurture in the first and early beginning parts of your life, bad diets, depression, etc..Most gays guys sadly enough go through so many different stages of chage, and may lack or denied the proper care our body needs in order to grow big and strong. Those who do become popular amongs society, and popularity equals more fans and more fans equals a perfect way of marketing a good looking guy for money. However, the media and society do not make the decision for you. You yourself are capable enough in picking whichever guy you want.

  80. Hapa 808

    From the sounds of it, the theme of this post, although its asking an open ended question, is one of insecurity. Insecurity does run rampant in the gay community, as does ways to compensate or cope, such as an obsession with looks and fashion, and/or drugs. I’m wondering why straight guys can’t just be a fetish, or even preference for gay men? I men, gay men are attracted to men….. beyond that, its all just preference. Based on this article, it would lead one to question…. why are there categories on gay site for jocks, black guys, and fetishes like with feet. Are gay men not athletic? Do they outwardly hate blacks but inwardly desire them? Why feet? Do they harbor a secret hatred of socks and toenail clippers?My answer is, of course not. Why do we always over analyze everything? Gay men are attracted to men, period. Beyond that there’s only.personal. preference whether its race, weight, body type, looks, career, and of course sexual orientation…. there’s nothing more

  81. Hapa 808

    Oh, and in response to your last questions… why is it so hot, or is it? Well, just depend on who you ask. Its not one or the other, its unfair to cast a net like that.

    And your last question, “is it okay?” Of course it is. If you say its not, you’re judging someone for their own personal preferences in what turns them on. And I think the gay community has been judged too much already, so let’s not keep doing it to ourselves.

  82. FreeRangeRadical

    Between 13 years in the military, college, working out at one gym or another, and years of domestic and international travel for business and pleasure, I’d say that about 60%+/- of the……considerable number of guys I’ve been with self-identified as straight. Some of it has been situational ; in the Army, for example, and stationed abroad in places where there’s limited contact with other Americans. Often they were married, usually <25, as was I. In 3 cases in the Army, I had wives "loan" me their husbands, sexually. Yes, they normally wanted to watch, and 2 of them were pregnant during the period of the "loan". OK, I’m a voyeur/exhibitionist, too.

    In other situations, I’ve always had this philosophy: If I walk into a club, bar, or coffee shop and I notice a really hot guy sitting by himself – and there’s usually a ring of other guys sitting 15′-20′ away secretly staring at him – I go straight to his table when I’ve gotten a drink or coffee or whatever. At worst, I’ve been told, politely, “thanks but I’m taken”, almost always delivered with a nice smile. You can tell they were, at least a little bit, flattered. At best…well, use your imagination. Yep, sometimes I go back to my hotel alone. About 10% of the time. The other 90%? Chances are, with the hot guy, and if not, at least it broke the ice, and after the ice is broken, the vultures who were sitting in wait pounce. LOL It’s funny but it’s true, and it almost never fails.

    I still keep up with a few that I met, had one great night with, and now email or text each other occasionally, often to see when I’ll be back in that part of the world. That’s when you know you did SOMETHING right.

    Are they straight? Well, I have a considered opinion about that: I believe that a person’s sexual self-identity can differ from his sexual preference(s). By this, I mean that a person may consider himself straight, but has had a one-off encounter with another guy. Or, has that ONE guy that he’s done something with, and wants to do more, yet has absolutely no desire, or almost no desire, to be with any OTHER guy.

    Let them call themselves what they will, why do I care? And here’s this: There are over 7 billion – that’s billion with a B – people on Earth. Why…WHY…do we feel the need to shoehorn all 7 billion into 2 or 3 sexualities? Even the Kinsey Heterosexual-Homosexual Rating Scale only has 7 categories, and I think that’s too few by an order of magnitude. For that matter, why label people at all?

  83. Bombay

    It is the present, in the near future I feel that a lot of people are looking pass the labeling of ones sexuality. I don’t think there is a such thing called orientation, preference or stereotypical label. I think people are more aware of what they find attractive, what turns them on, and what works best. As for me, I love men, only men, and all I need is one man. Women are gorgeous and sexy, but I don’t find females attractive. I know who I am and know what I want. So the question is would I sleep with a straight men? No, but do I fantasize on turning him out? Sure! But it boils down to. Do I really want a penis that has penetrated vagina in me, let alone my mouth. Why would I want something that has been inside something that has nothing to do with me? Man is the least of my problems, but I will tell you this. I follow my intuition, not trends. So if this straight/gay thing is what’s trending, I will leave it for the rest to follow.

  84. UrDesire714

    Well one main reason why i am gay is because i like men… not because i like women. To me seeing a guy who acts like a girl just turns me off… i want a MAN!!!!! lol and about the straight thing ??? i do find myself attracted to all my straight friends but i always remind myself that there are other men who are GAY who are MASCULINE, and i go for them.

  85. Mark Angelo

    Well, if it was “Gay gone Straight” we would accuse the far-right of some kinda plot against us! Shit like “Bait Bus”really does make us look bad! Straight boy suduction has always been a theme in porn, but their is a growing trend towards “Straight boys fucking” I might catch hell for this, but straight guys don’t fuck each other..BI guys do.

  86. Jack

    Hey Stephan,
    You bring up some good points, here in your blog…My take on the gay/straight thing, is the challenge of getting a straight man to do gay sexual things, whatever that might be…I have been out a very very long time (to many years),and I find it hard to even approach a straight man, fearing he would break my face or worse…I would enjoy a bi-curious or bi-sexual encounter…I have had one such adventure and it was fine in the beginning and just faded with time…My thought, is that a bi man with a wife or girlfriend is not looking to settle down, they just want some “guy” time and that is cool with me…But the real issue is that I do not believe you can change a straight man into a gay man…For this reason, if you were to ask a bi or straight male if he still wants to have sex with a woman,and he says yes, then he is not gay just curious…All the gay men I have ever known will only have sex with men…
    So, Stephan that is my take, I think it comes down to preference…


    Love your picture, very cute my friend…

  87. AJ

    Of course it’s all right to have a straight guy to have sex with you. Hell, three-quarters of the time when I go out, there’s at least a few straight guys who show up at the bars (not all gay ones, btw) and drink and try to be macho and crap and the later it gets and the more they drink, the more “curious” they get. If they want to find out what it’s like to have a guy suck their cock or are so horny to fuck, why shouldn’t I enjoy it?

    As to your question of “are we tired of each other” — I wouldn’t be tired of my fellow gays (most of them; there are some exceptions, of course) if they weren’t so busy building up such fucking drama about things. It’s not a freaking episode of Gossip Girl, guys — let’s just go out, have fun, laugh/dance/flirt and just enjoy being the amazing gay guys we are. But these days, it’s all about who did who and who’s cheating, who’s double-dating, who’s this, who’s that.

    We’ve forgotten to have a good time BECAUSE it’s a good time. Straight guys don’t have that shit going on. I’d rather play with them than another homo. 😉

  88. Marcus

    I’m personally a little miffed by the whole thing too. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve watched a few of the films where “converting” a straight guy is the theme, and they’re pretty hot. I, however, feel like the reason that they’re hot is because they put guys with the personality and the look that we idolize in everything else into those films which makes them more intriguing. On the scale of Tinkerbell to Tim the Toolman Taylor, I’m somewhere in the middle. Sometimes, it feels like the “straight guy fantasy” has made guys who should be in my peer group ignore me for the rougher/tougher looking guy to my right. I can try and convince myself that they’re missing out, and I can make myself agree. But it doesn’t change the fact. What I will say, however, is the ones where the “straight” jock goes for the nelly queen are kind of hot… Does that negate my own point?

  89. Steve

    I don’t idolize straight men. At all.

    I don’t find straight guys attractive on the virtue that I know I’d never have a chance with them..unless they were drunk.

    I don’t get the whole straight guy thing either…it’s pretty stupid imo

  90. Dan in Plattsburgh, NY

    It shouldn’t matter whether a guy is gay or straight! Gay men everywhere should NEVER hold another guy’s sexual preference against him! I wouldn’t discriminate against him just because he might be straight! I’m an equal opportunity cockwhore!

  91. Jon

    I think this is a good question. I think the underlying cause of the gay/straight thing being hot is because of fantasy. As you said before, it is that we want what we can’t have. That’s my opinion anyway.

  92. Kurt

    Your last question of your first paragraph hints at the main reason, I think, the lure of what we think we can’t have. But more than that, there is the lingering bit of hope that the statistics cited by Kinsey (which have mostly been debunked by subsequent research) are true, and that most guys are just a little bit bi or bi-curious, and therefore, every guy is theoretically a possibility.

    Aside from that, though, is the fact that the ease and confidence of many straight guys with respect to their appearances is a welcome break from a gay aesthetic which can often be superficial and fashion-conscious to the extreme.

  93. Steve-O

    I have often heard this: “A gay man’s biggest obsession is the straight man.” I believe there’s a lot of truth in that – at least for me. Because a straight man is considered “taboo,” it makes him even more desireable.

  94. David

    I am a out gay male with quite a few straight guy friends. I have fooled around with three of my straight guy friends on some level. They have all asked for it and we enjoyed ourselves. One guy and I fool around on a regular basis. Though he claims to be straight “and gay sometimes”. I think we are their pawns sort of speaking. When they are curious enough they will call on their “gay” guy friends they trust. I love my straight guy friends and if I am their experimentation vessel then heck why not. I have not lost a friend over it yet.

  95. Volcanoeyes

    I personally have never found a gay man that smells as good as a straight man. Pheromones have a huge effect on me of the degree of attractiveness of a man. So far, all the gay guys I’ve ever known smell almost the same, and it’s a smell I can’t stand. Straight guys seem to exude a different type of smell, something less sickly sweet than I’m used to.

  96. Brad

    I’m seeing the trend the other way around: from gay-to-straight (or bisexual), NOT straight-to-gay. I am referring to fantasy role-playing, or how a guy perceives his orientation (or self-identification).

  97. Pat

    You know there are lots of guys out there that are constantly talking about pussy, and for some reason (I don’t know why)they have a different look about them. I kid you not! It is this look that I find so fucking attractive. And they are also the first to slam gay people. So don’t you think I should hate them? I do! But guess what. They truly make my dick hard. Oh, by the way, this is in MY experience. But I absolutely know, just as some guys like to only fuck, and some guys only like to get fucked, that I am not alone in my experience. The key word is “some”. My point is that we’re all different! Speaking in terms of gay and straight is fucking pointless in my opinion. A guy who likes other guys will either openly talk about dick and sound like a fag, or he won’t say jack shit! And it absolutely sucks because in this world a guy who likes chicks will sound like a stud if he talks about pussy. But don’t lie because heterosexuals like you to prove yourself and before you know it you will have a bitch right before you and if you don’t truly like pussy, you’ve already lost your game.

  98. paul T

    I think its all about the gaydar, that the straight guy isn’t really straight, he is only closeted, he probably was checking you out before you even noticed, because he was looking, hopeing, horny, and if the time.and place is right things will happen, the supposedly straight, gay guy’ will act on something he’s been suppressing. because he is in the closet

  99. Steve

    basically the ones who seem to enjoy straight men are just sexual predators waiting for that one straight guy to be drunk enough for even just a bj. Kinda gross and weird if you ask me.

    And straight =/= masc. Stop that mindset.

  100. Romoni D'Aubigne

    The ‘convert a straight’ guy phenomenon that’s taking over the gay porn scene a wow to me. Guys like Cody Cummings & Samuel O’Toole, gay for pay, purely disgust me. Sites like, baitbus, ungloryhole & others are sad.

  101. mark

    I have sex with both str8 and gay men, the difference usually is that the str8 man wants to use you for his enjoyment which turns some of us on. The gay man in the bed puts pressure on the situation because you are both expecteed to please the other one in everyway. When a str8 man fucks me I am totally satisfied!

  102. J.T.

    I am convinced that everyone is bi… if they haven’t tried it they’ve thought about it… just need to get the fellas when they are feelin’ it for a guy… that won’t be always but it will happen, guaranteed

  103. Darryl

    All of this leaves a strange taste in my mouth. The question whether gay men are secretly thinking that all straight men can be had is just as silly as straight men thinking that all women can be had. We’ve all had our fantacies about having sex with a hot co worker, or the guy the coffee shop sitting alone. When you think in real terms you either find yourself wondering that should i go with my first instincts or let the situation pass by.

  104. chuck

    What happened to the days of old when men were men and not avting or imitating female icon or stars? Masculinity is the main attraction. If you are fem and date another fem than u should change ur gender and become a lesbian same difference or let a female put a strap on. Being gay and fem deafears the purpose of being attracted to another man. When u look for a dude you look for someone into sports, hunting, joining a bike club, a best friend that u can hang out with and no one is whisperingvabout his shake or arched eyebrows, but they are talking about how rugged he is and how he would make a good hubsand and nyou take that compliment quietly because u know it belongs to u. Sexually i become impotent for fem guys it wont work. But I still get excited for Va-jj(vagina)

  105. Steve

    I think it’s more because women are such a bore and at the same time want their version of equality which means they want the rights they had and then more which leaves us men with less rights than ever. I never disliked sex with women, it was the rest of the time I couldn’t stand them.

    Plus it is true that anything we are not supposed to do is always more fun.

  106. noteasy2get

    It is probably the same reason “straight” guys think that pursuing a lesbian would be so great, lack of familiarity with them allows one to create a fantasy about someone that would want nothing to do with them (sexually) in the real world. I hang primarily with straight people, male and female, because I don’t care for the sexual tension that can happen with gay friends, not to say I don’t have gay friends, and believe me I have no fantasy of seducing a straight man (admiring attractive ones yes, but actually thinking that it is a good idea or that it will end the way I want, no!).
    The porn aspect of it is simple, straight guys outnumber gay guys by a huge margin and the only way for a straight guy to make money in porn is to do gay (that is why 90% of it sucks, one or both or all really aren’t into it and have the acting chops of broke porn-stars); therefore we end up thinking that it is possible for us to attempt it with success.
    Humans are also naturally self-centered and it is natural for us to put our likes and desires on the population at large in order to feel normal, all people do this. That is why one can be so surprised that someone else isn’t into something one really likes, such as a favorite movie, song, or yes, even sex.

  107. Ink-Iron

    From my experience, I’d say its a waste of time. These days most guys, are full of shit. Especially online. I’m 46 and proud of my age, however this is the one thing that I have to lie about, because most of the young guys that I might lean towards feel that if your over 30, your considered that daddy’s age and that’s too dam old for them, and most of the guys that are in the my age group of 40 and above are usually on bullshit and they want to play a lot of games, and if we throw in the race card, the all of them are FULL OF SHIT! So to answer your question, STAY STRAIGHT MEET YOU A NICE FEMALE BE HONEST AND TRUTHFUL WITH EACH OTHER, AND MAKE IT WORK!

  108. Richard

    there is no future in having sex with a str. guy. nice sex but if you are looking for a LTR you are setting yourself up to get hurt. I live in a small town and there are several gay men here. most not out and some in an unhappy marriage. poor guys. take care and be careful guys

  109. Aleks

    I think it’s bc str8 men are more straight acting + they don’t have all the gay drama that all the other gay boys do. I think woman are beatiful but after the men been married for a while they get sick and board of the woman and woman don’t really like or know how to suck good dick like us. And how to let the man fuck u really really good besides the pusy. And I know a lot of married men who are married but have sex with men and even have a relationship with other gay men and they are happyier with there bf men or there gf or wife’s. And if a straight guy fucked a MAN he is not str8 at all …….. U can’t be str8 and fuck guys. You can’t be BI: I don’t belive in that shit. Ither ure gay or straight if a straight guy fucks a guy the first time to try they like it for sure and want more and don’t want to go back to woman …..

  110. Aleks

    All u say that u had sex with str8 men and half of u guys say it’s your fantasy to fuck or get fucked by a straight guy but clearly after you guys are done he’s GAY too
    After a straight guy fucks a man… He is gay u can’t fuck a guy and say ure str8 that’s wrong bc after the str8 guy is done with your gay ass he’s always going to be thinking of the hot gay sex with a guy. All ya need to get it togarher bc after he’s fucked u he gay too so no more fantasy for you.

  111. Matt

    I think that a lot of guys are open to whatever works for them at the moment. I don’t go looking for straight guys, but I have profiles on a few hookup sites. My profiles say that I love to suck dick, no strings, nothing needed in return……..and I get a lot of messages from guys who say that they are straight. I don’t really care whether they’re straight or gay, as long as I find them attractive, and they are willing to let me satisfy my oral fixation. I’m single and have no desire to change that, but I do enjoy sex from time to time. I think our society puts too much emphasis on labels……everybody is supposed to “be” something, conform to some definition……..well, I don’t think people in general can fit into societies confining definitions.

  112. Jack

    I think many “pure” gay men judge everyone/everything which should not be the case. At the end of the day, as long as either party (straight or not) want to engage in sexual activity…then so be it. Man and Man, Man and Woman…

  113. JERRY

    Do we really need labels?
    I can only guess why for others. For me,, as far as sites, such as this one, it seems a label is required, even tho 90% of the people here seem to just not see or want to see what we put in our profiles. I am sexual…. what does that mean? In my case, I am secure/ comfortable in my own skin. I enjoy sex, that’s the way it’s supposed to be, makes sense to me, I mean we’re not writhing in pain during, after, or even when we’re just thinking about it.( if you are , you might need a doctor, maybe a psychologist.)
    I never had any misconceptions about sexual pleasure. I love women, always have. Have a great,long marriage,I enjoy a great sexual and emotional connection with my wife.
    I realized early on, I really enjoyed my cock, cock is good….(grunt). I am sexually interested in cock.
    however, I generally do not, in my every day boring aspects of life,find myself checking out guys.
    I am checking out women…..Hm-mm, nothing strange here.
    I love getting my partner off, love the fact that I am giving that pleasure, love the feeling of the sexual connection. For me it’s totally natural to be, sexually with another guy,I love the sexual connection I can have with a guy, can’t get that with any woman. For me, this enriches my life.
    As with all the other aspects of my life and how I live it. I really couldn’t care less what anyone thinks of me. Well maybe a couple of people,they know me, and what I do in bed is not even a brief thought for them.
    So what fits??? within the confines of this arena..
    I am Bi. also bottom (with a guy) (guys, if you havn’t been there, I can’t explain.)
    More notable, I am genuine, just being me, have had a bit of time to refine that. Totally fine with who I am.
    As far as fantasy….watching good looking guys enjoying each other, I’m all for it, any way it’s labeled…

  114. New york Jay

    Sup im one of those guys ive seen u guys writing about . Str8 male who fell into the trapp i was seduced by a gay male.little did i know i was going to like it. Ive come to notice i am bi sexual my dick gets hard for. Both so by me saying that their is a such thing as gay for pay and gays who seduce str8 guys arent terrible they jus know what they want!! And may even what you want .this coming from a latin young bi male father of one in his twenties!

  115. FreeRangeRadical

    I see a lot of what amounts to ‘Thou Shalt Nots’ in the comments here – Thou Shalt Not Have Sex With A Married Man, Thou Shalt Not Have Sex With A Straight Man, Thou Shalt Not Enjoy Having Sex (OK, I made that one up).

    I am gay. I’m also a veteran, athlete, writer, and technical photographer. I’m lots of things, as are most here. But when did we add ‘Judge Of Others’ Behaviors’ to our credits?

    I hate to use ANYthing from the bible, but there’s a lot of truth to the notion to ‘let he who is without sin among you cast the first stone (depending on whose bible it is).

    Gay Person A believes in this and not in that. Gay Person B believes in THAT and not THIS. Gay Person C… you get the drift. Are these people who have nothing better to do than to sneer at others really that faultless?

    Here’s an old French peasants’ saying (I heard it on ‘The Tudors’, uttered by the Oh-So-Hot Henry Cavill, “Praise the god of all, drink the wine, and let the world be the world”.

  116. jomish

    Very interesting points here. I think it’s like how straight guys fantasize about having two women at once, or maybe a set of twins at once, even better. Or like how straight black guys want a white woman. It’s something out of the norm and, most of all, a challenge that, if met and overcome, will bring many rewards such as bragging rights and an inflated ego. For a gay guy to fuck a straight guy brings the same rewards. For a gay guy to TURN a straight guy must be like being crowned King Gay. I’m bi and find that i can satisfy my inner pig with a guy. The piggiest girl i’ve had still had limits. Guys will usually try anything once. Truth be told, while i hook up with guys afew times a year, i am not crazy about dick so much, or fucking man ass. It’w more the thrill of being on the DL as well as the feeling of being free to explore my nasty side without fear of rejection. If i could find a decent woman who is a total freak in bed, i highly doubt i would seek out guys as often as i do. So, i guess the answer is that there is no “the answer”.

  117. Nero

    let’s look at the ancient cultures like Rome and Greece. They married women and procreated with them, but they hung out with other men and fucked them for fun. Sure they fucked women for fun, but there was a risk of pregnancy. That and women expect you to talk to them and treat them like they matter. Men, take things for what they are. So, they fucked men for fun. It’s human nature to like both. Society has just made us think our way out of it.

  118. jdash

    Ive been with atleast 7 strait guys and i love it. The secrecy, and when u see them in public and you both kno what yall have going on but dont tell. Another good point is if your dl you kno ur secret is secure wit a “straight” guy. But i may be different and u guys may not agree but i lik it. No LOVE it. Ive turned a straight guy gay too so that tells me im good at what i do.and if your in the north central florida area hmu my name is sexidaddi101 😉

  119. leonpgh

    Well im a bisexual male and have had more than my fare share of straight men. In my opinion its to have something thats missing in our out gay culture. Masculinity. Straight males are generally our first attraction. Men being or seemingly manly. I love a good feminine guy but gimme a manly dude anyday. All in all they bend over and take it just like any out gay guy. Some better than others.

  120. Drew

    I think there is a certain sense of homophobia with in the gay community. For example, the number of profiles on Adam4Adam that request or demand that the sender of messages be “straight acting,” of the member’s profile simply states the preference for such an act. Personally, if a guy is hot, his effeminate nature will not faze my attraction to him, but when I was in the closet, I must say I felt somewhat uncomfortable around obviously gay men.

    In terms of the straight-to-gay porn genre: it could be a reflection of this subtle homophobia within gay culture, or it could just be the acting out of a fantasy that most gay men I have known have had at some point in their lives–Wanting a hot, straight guy that he cannot have, like the college jock one might fantasize about, striping from his sport uniform and doing the nasty with you.

  121. mtlguy

    A straight guy has a place near my lake side cabin. He must be around 30 y/o. He’s a construction guy. I have seen him and his girl friend 3-4 times in passing. Maybe he has seen me swimming and sunbathing naked, although i thought no one could see me, it’s very private. Recently he came knocking at my door and after chatting for 10 min i realized he was asking to have sex with me …although he never uttered the word ‘sex’. He said he kept having dreams about me and and that he was getting married soon and he want to try ‘it’ with me before getting married. He also said that i was the only guy he has ever had such dreams or thoughts about. For a moment i thought “poor guy i should help him out!” but i wasn’t turned on by him at that moment, and ‘straight’ is not a plus for me, so i refused his charming invitation to do ‘it’. But i’ve never seen him other than all dressed in his dirty construction clothes. This summer i’ll try to invite him to join me for a swim in the lake to see if i change my mind. Sorry guys to leave you hanging like that, maybe this summer i’ll have a juicier story for you 😉

  122. Tyson

    Lol gosh

    Homosexuals want to be accepted by others but can’t accept people in there own community. You people are fucked, it’s all about being manly, and that is why it seems so hot to be straight. Do you fools realize not every straight man is manly?

    Gay men trying to constantly trying to act straight, is like a black or Asian trying to act washed. There being fucked by the white man & gay guys fucked by the straight man. But i guess they like being controlled by the straight white man huh?

    I don’t think we will ever find acceptance by anyone else if there is no acceptance in our own fucking gay ”community” or whatever you wanna call it.

  123. Eric

    MOST DEFINITELY INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA! Being gay is just like being right or left handed. No big deal just variations on the human condition. When one looks to “act straight” it is just a COWARDLY way of living. Being masculine or feminine should NEVER be equated with or “being straight”. Once a “straight” man has sexual feelings NOT actions toward another man he is no longer straight PERIOD! The rest is just a charade.

    The preoccupation with straightness is just a desire to fit in and not feel different. The world still turns and water is still wet no matter who one has sex with. I find it really lame when there’s conquest or trickery involved in getting some guy in the sack. It speaks volumes and is more exciting when someone can’t wait to have sex sit you because of you.

    Lastly, the friends with benefits, closeted bisexual and married guys who have sex with other men are just using them and are afraid of having feelings for another guy. I would love to live in a world where I can be at a football or baseball game and kiss my man when our team scores and no one would bat and eye. That day will only happen when the cowards come out and gay sex is just as significant as another flavor of ice cream or beer.

  124. SouthernBoiSB

    Anybody else annoyed that those “Straight Guy/Gay Guy” sites are completely filled with “Gay Guy/Gay Guy”? I know porn has had some huge achievements over time, but incorrect information is a turnoff.

  125. SouthernBoiSB

    Tyson, why do you have a problem if other races want to bottom to white men? Should races just stay with each other…..or if a white male’s involved, he should be the bottom?

  126. WB

    It is more probably the allure of the unobtainable or unusual.

    How does it go? The things that we want the most are usually the things we can’t get? Something like that, that’s probably where all this “straight to gay” stuff comes from.

  127. Jim

    My opinion Part 1

    As a straight then bi then gay (LOL), I have my own opinion about this whole straight guy has gay sex. When it comes to sex and purely sex, I believe lots of people fall into a range of sexual orientations, meaning men have sex with women, women have sex with men, men have sex with men and women have sex with women. However, when it comes to who you fall in love with, emotionally relate to and want to spend the rest of your life with, you are one or the other. Sex is sex but who completes you is totally different.

  128. Jim

    My opinion Part 2

    Here’s another side to the straight guy/bi guy who does not want to deal with who they are. I found it on craiglist’s and thought is was spot on:


    Really what would you like to happen. Seriously. You say you want me to stay, but in order to do that I have to believe that you really want to be with me. If the case is that you are still trying to figure things out – tell me!! If the case is that you are in the closet – tell me!! You are attracted to men – you say you aren’t but for you to have this secret life on the DL – where you are stealing moments here and there – late at night while I’m sleeping, you alone in your office, etc…to ogle men’s penises and chat about sex…how isn’t it attraction. You kept saying that the idea of a man sucking your dick doesn’t repulse you – the flip side of that is that it excites you. I could suck your dick twice a day and swallow every time and it wouldn’t be the same. I can’t satisfy you sexually. You say that you enjoy having sex with me, but while I’m in the moment thinking about pleasing you and how good it feels – what are you thinking about??!! I can’t compete with a man and I don’t want to. I deserve the truth and every opportunity that you were given, you chose to deny me and keep me in the dark. Lying to me over and over again undermines any possibility of me trusting you. How am I supposed to believe given another chance to come clean that you will all of a sudden tell the truth now.

    What’s the point of lying – it only hurts me in the long run. I love you very much and I think you know that, and I can’t help think one of the reasons that you want me to stay is because I love you so much. and you know that I would do anything for you – people dream about being on the receiving end of the type of love I have for you. Even I dream about being on the receiving end. If you continue to lie and let this relationship continue, knowing that I have put all my hopes and dreams in our life together, you would be robbing me from the possibilities of a genuine love and my own happily ever after. Don’t be selfish and think solely of what you want in life. We are still young…now is the time to fall in love. Investing any more time in us robs me of what every woman dreams of. I deserve to be in a relationship with a man that is madly in love with me. Who is confident in his feelings for me and confident in our future together. I deserve a man that gets aroused when he sees me naked and excited when he touches me. I told you I want to be pursued – well it isn’t a chase if I’m throwing myself at you every time. don’t you think you have hurt me enough with all your lies??!! Be honest with yourself and tell me the truth. The worse case scenario is that you are gay – I love you so much I can still be your friend…Even after everything that has happened. The best case scenario???….I’m not sure.

    What do you really want to happen here – wishing I never found out??? You would have continued your secret life and I would have never known, what kind of life is that!! I deserve the truth!!! If you ever gave a damn about me, I beg you. You could have spared me the pain and tears last night (and the other times after a fishing expedition) if you would have told the truth instead of me finding stuff out piece by piece. Stop being so self-centered and narcissistic, stop thinking about you. Think about what lying does to me, my physical and mental well being, my heart, and soul. My soul is sad, but I can never be truly content if you continue to be deceitful.

    Please be honest… think about what you have done to me already, if you continue to lie to keep me around then you are no better than a wife beater…breaking me down until there’s nothing left. You have a chance to do the right thing – please be honest…

  129. Jim

    My opinion Part 3

    Stop trying to get straight guys to have sex with you. The real men are those who have dealt with themselves and are honest about who they are. If you are bi, then be honest with your partner and have full disclosure. However, most guys (and it’s usually men) want it both ways. The nice “straight” accepted life but the gay sex when they get the urge. I was there and it takes so much energy. Coming out was the hardest thing and best thing I have ever done and I have never looked back. Like one of the comments above, it would be nice if we could say not have labels and be who we are. That being said wouldn’t it be nice if we who do identify as gay, have all the legal rights of “straight” people? Think about it!

  130. Jim

    Final thought

    From Torch Song Trilogy:

    “Just once I would like to see a “bi-sexual” sneak out on his boyfriend to be with his girlfriend”

    Charles Pierce

  131. VP

    Because it wasn’t right. It didn’t feel right afterwards and apologized the very next day. We were both drunk and I believe he had been smoking and everything was just… weird. I had been in love with him since I was 14 and we were 20/21 when it happened. I’m always so confused on things though… I kissed him and he didn’t refuse it. He kissed me back and asked me to touch him… so I did and then it just went from there and more. I don’t know if he really remembers much but I don’t know. As exciting and fun as it was, I hate it. Not sure if it’s the reason, but we rarely talk anymore or do anything together. I haven’t seen him in like 2 years coming from where I use to spend every single day with him.

  132. glass_stem

    To be honest, I personally do not like straight guys because they are just focused on getting their cock to blow a load and then want to go on with their happy ass. Well, guess what buddy? I’m trying to bust a nutt too. I’m gonna stick my dick in your ass and down your throat. Besides, there’s all this drama that comes along these so called straight boys because they don’t know what to do. They want to please their dicks while pleasing society but meanwhile are unhappy and don’t know why. Well its because they are not living for themselves and that’s just too much drama. I didn’t come out until 2 years ago and I haven’t looked back since. I love my community and wish I would have come to terms with myself sooner but since I didn’t I am not gonna miss anymore by chasing some straight dude. I’ll gladly find some queen that’s down for loads of fun ; )

  133. smileysig

    This matter, for me, lays intimately with the reason why I’m gay, or as I like to say, why I prefer masculine sexual energy over femanin sexual energy. With me, I’m drawn to the outward presence of strength and I want to give in return what I find. So, I often find myself drawn to strong straight men. I feel that happens because we, as gay men, are told from birth that only a woman can lay with a man, or be emotionally aware, or be artistically creative, or do nearly anything that has to do with left brain function. In light of that, I believe, many gay men develop flagrant feminin traits in response to their conscious or subconscious desire to be what another man is suppose to be with. In my life, however, I haven’t done that. People identify me as a straight acting gay, and though I have been in love with a woman before, I still identify myself as gay. With that said, I guess I could I say that my infatuation with straight men is their more masculine energy over that of gay men. It reminds me of strength, a trait I wish to exude, myself. That may offend people, but it’s how I feel. It isn’t to say there is no such thing as a strong gay man, but it is to say, that the strong gay man that I am attracted to would be commonly perceived to be straight.

  134. Timothy

    I agree to every one but the one that touches me the most is the post that says how society has tried to change us gays str8 and that we rebel against it so why should we stoop down and try it on str8 men…the way i see it u can be gay,str8,curious,or bi for all i care as long as i get your dick now i know that makes me sound like a horror but i dont give a shit im just here to help them figure out what they are i have 2 married men that i still meet ad i live 5 miles from a marine corp base so i get a lot of str8 curious ppl that i blow and never hear from again so with that said why do we care whats there label as long as there HOT and u get there dick its all good right?…

  135. cgncrdns

    Okay.. I’m gay because i like men. If a guy acts more like a girl than a man them I’m not going to be attracted to that man. The manlier the better!

  136. Bottom Q.Easy

    Shane,you got it right man! 110% correct!!! Gay men generally live lives true and have the currage to go for want thay want, “straight”(GAY) men hide and live dubble lives lying & manipulating the people they say they love the must! Never really loving them in the true sense of the word! So many of them are really emotional vampires,living off other peoples true emotions,void of any real consciousness or empathy themselves! Men who are called “Down low” or “str8” are really Selfish,greedy, and weak! They are in my opinion just the worse innd of man!

  137. Gino

    Well you see that is why I’m single. To many guys want guys wo look and act straight. But I personally don’t give a fuck anymore. Yeah I may like to use skin care products and I may have a soft voice. But the thing is I don’t wear makeup and guys personally only want another narcistic asshole to use and fuck. Only to stare at one another like peacocks do.

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